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Monday, May 10, 2004 ynoe i cant figure out if i've been rehired by FOTT or wot, man. they keep calling me back to do their bidding. which is a good thing, i spose, since im getting paid to do their bidding. owell. money earned is a good thing, right? anyways. i was out with the ol poly gang yesterday night. i was with Nadiah, rishi beardy, Naddy, Din abang, Chups and Elaine. we just mooched around and chilled out for a couple of hours. i love the ol gang :) however, the buggers had/wanted to go home early(like, at 11pm. thats pretty damn early, yo) so i called Chai up and asked him if we could meet up. and so i ended up with Chai&co at Swing, which is this pub thats got a live band at cuppage. been there a few times before, its alright i spose. so anyways. we were all there to celebrate Eldon's birthday. well, everybody else was there to celebrate Eldon's birthday. i didnt know t'was Eldon's birthday til Chai told me. but t'was cool!! i later gave him a really really cool birthday present.. i'll tell you abt it soon.. *chuckle* so yeahh. i was there with Chai, Eldon, Kensuke, Andre, Janice Goh, Priscilla, Glenn np, Mark, Sean, Ben, Neo, and these 2 other girls. i think their names're Jan(not to be confused with Janice Goh) and Chong Hui. and Chai told me, "maddie, i like yer cross." coz i was wearing this ostentatious black jewelled cross around my neck. and Eldon said, "maddie, i like yer lace." coz i was wearing this clingy top that looked like lingerie and it had lace over the right boob. and then Chai and Eldon went like, "ooh.. maddie.. so sexy.." and im like, "shut up, fuck." anyways. back to Swing. Andre was cool, he bought me my first bottle of beer for the night. thanks man, you rawwwkk. go go heineken! and Andre! he's a year younger than i am but he's so cute, i wish he was my lil bro. he's taller than me tho. then again, who isnt..? *grumble mutter mumble* so yea. anyways. some of us played 5-10(my suggestion) and Janice Goh went all gungho, she said that the first time you get it right, the person on yer left drinks. which is what happens normally yea. however, if the person gets it right a 2nd time, the person on the left doesnt drink, the person has to choose either Truth or a Dare. and the third round, well, its just Dare. and guess what? Janice Goh Pek Lin is sitting on my left. and the whole night, only one person was made to choose either a Truth or a Dare. and it only happened once. and i got both rounds right. haha! so first round, Janice downed some Johnnie Walker straight(yea, everyone's gotta drink that during 5-10. i dont know who brought the unopened bottle down, but man, the entire bottle was gone by the end of the night). and the second round i got it right(no one else ever got a second round right.. i SO rock), she had to choose between a Truth or a Dare. and she chose a Dare. so this is where Eldon's birthday present comes in. killing two birds with one stone, ynoe ynoe ;) lil ol efficient moi. so for the Dare, i made Janice lick Eldon's year really seductively for 10seconds. pictures were taken, the moment was immortalised in film. yippee! happy birthday, Eldon. he liked my present, he told me he did. and then of course i lost once at 5-10 and i had to drink the Johnnie Walker. it is bloody fire. but i got quite high la. luckily Andre had bought like 6 bottles of hoegarden(one of those bottles were for me) so i had smth to wash the black label down with. anyways. most of us were in in this drunken crazy festive mood. t'was crazy, but t'was crazily fun. lemme list down some of the stuff we did. 1)Eldon opened up the cgar one of the guys gave him and he smoked it. and he was like some giant pimp ynoe, with the swagger and the cigar in his mouth. 2)coz a live band plays at Swing, they asked if anybody was having their birthday there. and of course we all yelled, "Eldon!!" and Eldon waved his arms around like crazy. and they asked him up on stage, and asked him to sing a song. he didnt know what song to sing, the fella. but he picked a good song in the end, man. he sang No Woman No Cry by Bob Marley. man.. the band played.. and Eldon sang.. and some of us at the table just stood up and SANG right along with him.. i was one of em. and we waved our arms.. and i took up a lighter and waved it along too.. and Glenn np took up the tealight thingy on the table and waved THAT.. man.. that was an awesome moment, man.. 3)and most of us got really damn high as the night wore on. the waitress brought Eldon's birthday cake out, and we sang, and only a slice of cake was cut. the rest wasnt. i dont know who started flinging cake around, but i got it on my face and clothes and hair and back and jeans and even on my bloody jacket. and i was so high i couldnt even clean myself up properly, Andre was cleaning Janice and me up. i mean, if i was sober i would've gotten pissed off to have cake on my face and all man. but i was high, and everything was just fucking funny, ynoe. i even found it amusing that i couldnt clean myself up properly. i cleaned the cake off my face, and i thought i was done. and then Andre comes up to me and he's wiping me up and im like, "WHOAHH!! i NEVER knew there was cake THERE! or THERE! or THERE!!" but i said it all in my head la. that was a great moment of self-discovery. almost felt like the moment Jesus was born. 4)i got really emo when i was high, and i went to take a piss, and alluva sudden i decided to call Donovan. and i was just being all fucking emo la.. *shudder* but yea. and i'd be talking to him in the loo, and Chai and Andre and whoever would be banging on the toilet door from time to time, yelling, "maddie! are you okay??" and i'd yell back, "im alright! fuck off!!" but they never did really properly piss off, coz they'd come back. i love my concerned friends. they make sure i dont kill myself.. just kidding. i wouldnt kill myself ever. unless i got really really drunk one day and then i stumble onto a road and a lorry mows me down. but that wouldnt be me killing myself, that'd just be a tragic accident. and not JUST tragic, it'd be bloody tragic thats wot it'd be, coz the world would never again have another Maddie like me, and then what would the world do, eh? 5)Chai toppled over alotta beer bottles the entire night. he spilled beer on Janice, too. i dont know, Chai was just super clumsy la. 6)and when i was high, i saw Janice gulping down the johnnie walker straight from the bottle as if t'was water. if i'd been sober i would've grabbed the bottle from her hands. however, i wasnt sober, i was inebriated. so iall i did was stare at her drinking and mumble to myself, "wah lau.. she's crazy.. she's damn crazy man.." 7)Janice and Glenn np ended up getting piss drunk and unconscious. both of em barfed up. and then Chai sent em back to his place so they could sleep. apparantly the both of em were really heavy. ah well. bloody deadweights, waddya expect, eh? *** and after that, the bunch of us went to cine to catch Van Helsing at 4.15am. we met Soong and Eugenia, and only the both of em, Chai, Eldon, Andre, Pris, Kensuke and i caught the movie. the rest headed home. and at cine, we saw Shawn there. Andre and i talked to him a lil, Andre more than i. they were both in the same year at barker and i dont know Shawn that well, after all. but the boy's lookin goooood!! *chuckle* and we all kept bumping into Shawn at cine. i mean, its like 3+am at cine, there arent loads of people around ynoe? plus Shawn was wearing this long sleeved maroon shirt and you cant miss that shirt in a *not* crowd. and coz i was still kinda high, i was doing stupid things la. like when the bunch of us were on the escalator up i spotted Shawn downstairs, and i yelled,"BYW SHAWN!" and then Andre would yell,"BYE SHAWN!"..and so the vicious cycle continues. and i got a piggyback from Eldon outside cine, and Chai and Andre gave me a bloody wedgie. not that i was sober enough to give half a rat's arse abt it. i was juse a tad concerned that they'd over-stretch the elastic on my thong. heyy, its a pretty thong, and i defend my pretty thongs with a vengeance(when im sober) alright. Eldon had bought a 1 litre packet of orage huice with pulp and was drinking it straight outta the packet. i wanted some too, so i poured some into my mouth. i missed the 2nd time and got it on my neck and down my top. bloody hell. i had to go to the toilet and clean up best as i could but i still felt orangey sticky. so yea. we caught Van Helsing, which is a pretty no-brainer show. but a good no-brainer show la. i quite fancied Dracula's three brides. gorgeous, sexy, voluptuous, bloody evil and with the ability to fly.. what more could a girl want? i started feeling kinda ill during the movie tho, and i kept fidgeting. my contacts were so damn dry, plus i was starting to have a splitting headache. but Andre, who was sitting beside me, was kind enough to offer me some of his water. thanks, dude. *grinz* and t'was pretty cool. i quite felt like kate beckingsale in the movie. damn i forgot her character's name. but she was so cool. she had those spiky boots(which i've got) and she was also wearing this big black crucifix around her neck, like i was during the movie. im cool!! *cough* and after the movie, that was it. t'was 6.30am when the movie was over, and all of us were pretty damn tired. the bunch of us slinked outta cine.. and i saw Shawn outside again. Andre was talking to Shawn, and i said bye to em, and then i got into Chai's car. i would've gone home by myself but my headache was quite killing me. Andre wanted to gimme some cash to take a cab home coz he said that Chai was too tired to send me back but i didnt wanna take his money and besides, i knew that Chai could and would send me home coz chai's so damn nice. *grinz* but really, i appreciated him sending me back la, i really did. he's a brudda for life, that fella. he's a real keeper. i got back home, and i seriously thought i was gonna barf. i took a shit when i got back home, and my head hurt so i lay my head down and i nearly fell asleep. i soon realised that it'd be really gross to fall asleep in the loo with the smell of crap wafting in the air so i took my bath, lay down on my bed, and conked out from 8am til 1.30pm. i even had cake in my hair from the cake-flinging at Swing but i was too damn shagged to wash it all out. t'was like gel, man. everyone had cake in their hair. blergh. and thats abt it for the whole of saturday and half of sunday. saturday rawwwkkked my socks off. and later, on sunday afternoon, i woke up, was a good girl, didnt go out with Donovan but stayed home with my mom instead, washed my hair and the cake outta it(finally), and did some chores before i went back to sleep and my mom went out with her friend for dinner. Happy Mothers' Day, y'all. i love my friends, and i love my mommy too. *muacks*
spat vitriol @ 1:14 AM
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Wednesday, May 05, 2004 i've just completed Dan Brown's The Da Vinci Code for the 2nd time this week. it took me 9 consecutive hours to complete the book the first time, i just couldnt put the book down. my eyes were completely fried by the time i was done with the book, man. t'was like 9am in the morning and i msged Erwin to tell him that i was done with it. he'd only lent me the book the day before. it really was a fantastic read the first time round. Erwin was half-right, atheists would love the book. it seems to take a side that stands against christianity. i even caught myself laughing and giggling out loud while reading coz certain bits amused me so much. like the mischief Leonardo Da Vinci(who i thought was simply brilliant, wayy before even before reading the book) can get up to, or simply coz the book talks abt how flagrantly pagan christianity really is.(i quite love that take, really) at the end, tho, the author really takes quite a neutral stand, its simply the evidence that seems to make it appear as tho he doesnt. this 2nd time round reading it, i could've taken a longer or shorter time to finish it, i dont know.. reading the book was just to kill time. like reading it during telly adverts. or now, when nobody's awake and im dead bored. t'was more of an idle read the 2nd time round, reading it without the zeal to reach the ending as quick as possible coz i already know the ending. so i read the book(coz there's nothing else in the house to read without feeling overly familiar with the material), and now that im done with it, i decided to come online. *yawnn* this dreary routine.. if ONLY it had a soporific effect on me. but it doesnt. in fact, im bloody wide awake, godammit. anyways. frankly, reading The da Vinci Code just reinforced my.. opinions.. on christianity. i wont really go there, coz i dont exactly want idiots picketing outside my hdb flat or stoning me to death. it can all get so primitive sometimes. as i quote Leonardo Da Vinci, Grand Master of the Priory of Sion(dont ask), he said: "Many have made a trade of delusions and false miracles, deceiving the stupid multitude." he also said: "Blinding ignorance does mislead us. O! Wretched mortals, open your eyes!" ..which was quite how i felt abt the followers of christianity. might i also stress that i am much of a pessimist, and that what i'd seen of so-called 'christians' further served to demonstrate to me how far off from the Lord they actually are. (most of) them show no sincerity, or genuine faith, in the religion. they're either selfish/greedy/annoying/pesky/boastful/(fill in the blanks with one or more chosen words) or all of the above, and blatantly went against the ways of the bible and the church, yet proudly called themselves christians over and over again.(by the way, i really wanna strangle these kinda people.. no bloody respect for their own religion, man) and those who show genuine faith display no understanding of why they even believe in the religion in the first place. i admit, and i know that i'll offend some people, such ignorance disgusted me. how could one be happy NOT knowing? how could you have such faith in smth when you knew almost naught abt it? of course, there're all sorts of believers out there, and they all didnt impress me. these believers're like the faces of christianity, they represent the religion to me, and what i saw didnt reflect well on the religion at all. lets not yet talk abt the opinions you have, hold yer tongue and outrage til im done, you impatient ones.(luckily for you impatience isnt a sin) UNTIL monday, when i was out with Jon, Yong Lit and Chuan De.. my outlook on the religion has slightly altered coza the talk i had with Yong Lit. see, in the past, whenever i expressed my vehemence abt how i couldnt stand that whole 'ignorance is bliss' crap that christians seemed to have abt their religion, or wadever else t'was that irked me abt the religion, at the end of it all, people would say to me: (1)why bother? its their problem wad. (2)there're questions out there that God leaves unanswered. trust me, maddie, i've got questions too. (3)why get so worked up? its not good for you. eh what dya wanna have for lunch ah? and the only answer that enraged, yet placated me, at the same time: (4)christianity has done these people alot of good. if their faith does them good, and they're happy not knowing, yet live fulfilled lives. what's the problem here? see. the problem now lies with ME. coz I'VE got a problem with it all. and the questions i had abt the attitude of christians still bugged me(along with other factors that bugged me), but i tried not to let it bother me or anything, coz i realised that i could get overly affected by the whole affair.(no shite) so. i was getting to my point. Yong Lit and i talked. abt christianity. and like i said, i asked the questions, he gave the answers. and for the first time(this guy knows his stuff, yo. three cheers for bible classes!), i felt like i was actually getting proper, sensible answers. answers that more than justified number(4), which was 'christianity has done these people alot of good. if their faith does them good, and they're happy not knowing, yet live fulfilled lives. what's the problem here?'. this dude, used to be so anti-christianity he was practically satanic. i exaggerate, of course. but y'get what i mean. Yong Lit was seriously, majorly anti-christianity. next to him, i was nothing. not that im super duper anti-christianty, i've just got a slight problem with it. anyways. and now here he was, worshipping the floor the Holy Trinity walks on. 360 degree change, and totally weird. freaky. strange. unnatural, even. but anyways. i'd known that he'd converted a long time ago, so i was cool with it. he's not a bloody preacher, ynoe. and t'was good to know that he was against hell-fire preachers. ooh.. i SO do not like those people. we got talking, and he answered alot of my questions patiently and his answers werent slip-shot, they were in-depth and detailed. when i asked him my questions, i didnt attack him, either. i held a genuine curiosity and respect for what he had to say, coz i havent met a single christian who's been able to give me satisfactory answers.(isnt that sad? what does this reflect on modern day christians?) if i'd been grading those other christians out there, they would've failed. miserably. Yong Lit got a 23 and a 1/2 upon 25, which is a pretty good grade. ynoe, upon 25, like how you'd grade a literature essay. anyways. i found the stuff he had to say pretty engaging. most of it, i was hearing for the first time.(since no other christian's been able to answer me properly on most accounts. not even christians who's gone to church and youth fellowship for years. godd.. the lousy buggers) he even told me a few pretty cool stories abt how the israelies managed to defeat the arabs at war, defending their land, when they had much less ammo and soldiers. that was cool. t'was a modern-day miracle, man. he's gonna lend me the dvd on that. its a 6hour long dvd, but he said that i could fast forward to all the war bits. i think i wont do that, i wanna watch it all. hopefully i'll be able to pay attention long enough. narration's great, but i hope that it wont be monotonous narration thruout the entire thing.(i dont even know if there'll BE narration) there were questions that Yong Lit werent able to answer, and he was frank abt that. not like some other people who act like they know alot but know jackshit. and i was alright with him not knowing those rare few questions, coz he'd already provided me with so many other in-depth answers to questions i had. and yeahh, i guess im pretty much neutral abt the whole thing now. pretty much thanks to Yong Lit, he's reinforced my way of thinking to take a neutral stand on the whole christianity thing. im still a lil shaky, of course. i mean, i havent exactly been rooting for christianity for most of my life.(since i was able to talk, i think) its difficult to take a neutral stand after all this time and accept the crap that the so-called christians are gonna dish out to me later on in life. dont get me wrong yea, the genuine christians, i support. you go do yer own thang and be cool, and dont let anybody be bringing you or yer faith down.(i hopefully wont go back to doing that) right now, im gonna be as neutral as i can get, until somebody pisses me off. hopefully i wont meet that unfortunate soul. unfortunate for both of us, i think. but really, i DO wanna be neutral. process info from both sides, tho not necessarily taking a side. that might be a lil tough, what with human nature and all, but i'll try. i've been too tough with christians and their faith for a tad too long, i think.(no shite) i figure, its more entertaining, educational and informational to be neutral, as well. and it wont kill my blood pressure the way my previous stand on christianity did. just let no misinformed miscreant come preaching to me with his shallow takes on the religion, proclaiming allegories in the bible to be real, or boasting how much he knows when he knows naught. i wont do anything to him, but it can get really annoying. bloody buggers. thankfully(for me), i dont see much of those kind of people anymore. mainly coz i dont go to, dare i say it, church anymore. actually, more like youth fellowship. and people i know outside know not to say anything, either coz they know how i feel abt the religion, or coz they dont know much and choose to keep mum. hopefully, people will stop going to christianity for the wrong reasons. and i mean the WRONG reasons, like going to church to hang out with the opposite sex(or same sex, which ever way they swing), that kinda thing. and hopefully, people will start being more serious when they take up the religion. i think these days, christianity's being taken too lightly. religion isnt smth you take up for fun, its a responsibility. and i think that alotta people dont/havent realised that. maybe if all goes well, christianity will start being taken more seriously by everyone, believers and non-believers alike. and i'd like to see that happen. you dont have to believe in a faith or religion to have respect for it, and maybe the faces of christianity will make that happen. im neutral now. dont stone me to death. murder's a sin, anyways.
spat vitriol @ 6:42 AM
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Tuesday, May 04, 2004 its been exactly a week since i've blogged, and i cant remember much of what's happened.. well. some stuff worth remembering, or that i've actually remembered, anyways. i went out with Nadiah, Rishi beardy, Din abang and Naddy on saturday. we just chilled out at parkway, aplnning to go to KL, talking rubbish. and then Nadiah(i love that girl!!) and i went to town to hang out for awhile before she went to meet Y for a movie and i went to meet Sara DJ, Sidney tinks and Jeremy. well. the bunch of us just hung out at lido mac's. then we went to shangri-la *sighh* which was a complete waste of time. expanded energy for nothing. Bizhen, El Paulo, Mark 6, Danny, Erik and Gerald kor were there too. then we decided to leave coz we werent doing jack and the bunch of us ended up at balestier eating bak kut teh. Gekpuay joined us for supper there. bak kut teh was quite good, but t'was 5 bucks for a bowl. i'd pay 5 bucks for a bowl of dog meat, not pork, but the bak kut teh wasnt too bad la ;) and on sunday i watch like 9 straight hours of telly, gradually going blind as the radiation fried my frickin eyeballs. when i finally got up from the damn couch i had a headache. so much for a productive sunday. whoopEEE! and on monday, meaning just a couple of hours ago, i was out with Jon, Yong Lit my senior and Chuan De. i havent hung out with em in yonks and t'was quite, how shall i put it, refreshing to be chilling with em again. *chuckle* aye.. dont get me wrong la k. they're cool company aight!! we were at suntec, and then we got bored after mking plans to go to KL(wassupppp with everybody and KL man??), so we all got into Jon's mazda and we went to east coast. we ate at the renovated hawker centre there. we chomped(speaking of chomp, i gotta go to chomp chomp soon sia) down sting ray, olua and satay. the guys had coconuts, and i had sugarcane, which was bloody damn sweet. sugarcane.. el excellento, my muchachos. then the 4 of us trudged to the beach, which was just a walk away from the hawker centre, and we sat down there just talking. and after awhile, i think we got bored or smth, and we migrated to kallang to sit by the water and talk some more. like Yong Lit said, we were just moving from one body of water to another body of water. and him and i talked abt christianity. more like, i asked him questions, and he answered em with the patience only a christian could possess. intriguing stuff. and then jon sent us all home, me first. coz i stay so far away from all of em, they're all East Side Kids. okayy. and this is pretty cool. people're telling me that im looking thinner and all. lemme categorise it coz it makes me feel good, be what they say true or not. ha! talk abt being self-delusional, girl. Rishi beardy: said that i've lost weight, im looking good, and told me that my body looks elongated. i told him that i added an extra rib to my body, see.(i am now Adam) Nadiah: said that i've lost weight, im thinner, and i've got a nice tan. Din abang: said that im thin.. i think. Bizhen and Erik: said im thin and that i've got a really flat stomach. Jon: said that i've lost ALOT of weight. he said that im chao da, too. and then he asked me what's wrong with me. i could see in his eyes that he thought that i was anorexic or smth. of COURSE im bloody not anorexic, i dont have the willpower and determination to not eat for extended periods of time man. and im not bullimic either, i think thats alot worse than being anorexic, actually. so yupp. thats it. thanks to those who.. "complimented" me..(allow me to continue being blatantly self-delusional, will ya?) and im engraving all this 'thin' stuff down in stone not coz im buay hiao bai.. oh okayy, i am, but its also coz i dont actually remain desirably thin for long, and i havent had so many.. "compliments".. over sucha short period of time, and im just relishing it ynoe. RELISHING it!!! so im thin. and gorgeous. bite me, biatch. THIN THIN THIN! and GORGEOUS!! *cough* anyways. i shall be calling Sara DJ now so that we can catch up on stuff. and by the way, when i say "thin and gorgeous" i actually think of Victoria Adams a.k.a Posh Spice a.k.a Victoria Beckham. godd i love that chick. she's got the bloody money, she's got the bloody looks, she's got the bloody body, she's got the bloody style, she's bloody got a perfect life! cept for an unfaithful husband, but that can easily be resolved if her PA skills live up to its name.
spat vitriol @ 1:19 AM
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